Terminal illness: Supporting a terminally ill loved one
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My loved one has been diagnosed with a terminal illness. How will our relationship change?
How can I help my loved one cope with a terminal illness?
Is there a typical emotional process that a person who has a terminal illness experiences?
How do you help a loved one who's in denial about his or her impending death?
When is denial harmful?
What else can I do for my loved one?
Is it important to keep a vigil by my loved one when he or she is near death?
Is it appropriate to tell your loved one that it's all right to let go?
What advice do you have for people who are grieving?
What do you tell people who are struggling with guilt?
How do you help a loved one who's in denial about his or her impending death?
Denial is a coping mechanism. Your loved one might be in denial because reality is too frightening, too overwhelming, or too much of a threat to their sense of control. The person might be afraid of pain or losing control of their bodily functions or mind. They might also fear failing family or becoming a burden.
Denial can allow a person to let reality in bit by bit and continue living while contemplating death. As long as denial isn't causing significant harm — such as by causing the person to seek out painful treatments of no therapeutic value — then it isn't necessarily bad.
To provide emotional and spiritual support, invite your loved one to talk about their fears. Sometimes, however, it's easier for a dying person to share fears with a spiritual counselor.
